Christmas
Nuttiness
Have you ever watched a squirrel on a
fall day scrambling around gathering nuts?
They dash from place to place frantic to gather all they can. They cram acorns into their cheeks until they
look like fuzzed up electrocuted rats with goiter. Nuts! Just plain nuts! It’s all that’s on their mind.
My wife is a lot like that at the
holidays - particularly the frantic scurrying around and nuts part. Nuts remind me of the panicked call I received
to dash to the store to buy nuts while the cookie recipe was still in the mixer
without the necessary ingredients. When
I came home we went nuts with joy at being rescued from the nut shortage crisis
contrived from the nutty idea we should start making cookies without all the
necessary ingredients.
Today my wife took the cookies to the
grandkids' daycare so they could decorate their own Christmas cookies. These were the cookies, of course, without
the nuts because who knows if one of the little darlings would be allergic to
nuts. Go figure. I wasn't supposed to be involved in this
project, but in a panicked rush to load her treasure trove of cookie decorating
goodies, she forgot the cookies on which the frosting would be smeared. I save the daycare day with an emergency
cookie delivery.
I am as afraid of going to a daycare
center where preschoolers are armed with plastic knives and green frosting as a
squirrel is crossing a four-lane road.
This is nuts! It is frightening
to see squirrelly four-year-olds with sugar sprinkles and waving frosting
covered knives like Zoro. Still you gotta
hug your grandkids. Now my clean jacket
is covered in frosting and red sprinkles.
Aw nuts! Merry Christmas, dear
wife! I’ll tell her when she stops
scurrying around.
